Weather Forecast

Find more about Weather in Holyoke, CO
Click for weather forecast
Reader fears election results PDF Print E-mail
Written by Holyoke Enterprise   

I have decided that I can run for mayor, governor, Congress or the Senate, and I can win. I have figured out the plan. Here is how it goes:

I can tell you, the American people, that I will cut your taxes and it won’t cost you a dime (even though that is fuzzy math), and you will believe me.

I can tell you that President Obama was not born in America (even though his birth certificate is there for the world to see), and you will believe me.

I can tell you that President Obama is not a Christian (even though I cannot read hearts), and you will believe me.

I can tell you that God spoke to me and told me to hate the Jews, the Asians, the Muslims, the Hispanics, the blacks, the disabled, the unemployed, the welfare recipients (even though God is love), and you will believe me.

I can tell you that Social Security, Medicare and Medicaid are unnecessary social entities (even though they have worked for and helped people for many years), and you will believe me.

Oh yes, and I can tell you that I have great experience in foreign affairs because I can see Russia from my patio (and you will cheer me on), because you will believe me.

I can tell you that government is corrupt and should be done away with (while I am applying for a job with the government), and you will believe me.

I can tell you that I want to restore freedom (while at the same time, I want no freedom for gays who serve our country or those pesky reporters when I don’t like the questions they ask), and you will believe me.

I can tell you that I believe in the Constitution (except when I don’t know what the First Amendment says), and you will believe me.

Lastly, I can tell you that if I don’t win, I will use my Second Amendment rights against you (which means I will take you out), and you will cheer me on. . .

Is this a great country or what!

P.S. Be careful what you wish for; you may get it Nov. 2. Goodbye America the Beautiful.

Betty C. Smith