Your marriage matures in surprising places

    We were young and barely knew each other, but we took a road trip to Atlanta — eight hours away — for a leadership conference. Some people would call it crazy, and I guess we were. In the big city, we visited one of my best friends from high school and went to Eatzi's market and bakery to grab dinner — it was filled with gourmet cheeses, chocolates, fresh warm bread, samples and more.
    I walked passed the floral section and saw a bouquet of sunflowers with Jeremiah. “Oh I love these!” I said. “My favorite flower.”
    After walking around the market, Jeremiah snuck back to the floral shop and scooped the sunflowers up in his arms and paid for them at the register. He handed them to me and my eyes lit up.
    
The work of marriage
    That was 14 years ago. Fast forward to this past week. Recently, stopping at a sunflower field after picking my son up from camp, I was reminded of what God birthed in us in our early 20s. The memories of our young love flooded my soul with gratefulness and showed me the miracle of today.
    Little did we know as two friends — soon to be lovers — that the winds, rain and hail would one day attempt to destroy the garden of our marriage. Marriage faces the constant threats of unmet expectations, miscommunication, career changes, parenting hardships, financial pressure, personality differences, selfishness and more. Little did we know the kind of labor required to cultivate the right conditions for a strong and healthy marriage.
    In these moments, I’ve asked, “Lord, how can you make this work when all seems dark?”
    
How light shines in
    Over the years I’ve learned that light shines in when I humble myself and let the Spirit work. When I bear all things, believe all things, hope in all things, and endure in all things (1 Corinthians 13:7).
    Light shines in when:
    — I face the hard questions: Will I follow Jesus’ ways or my own selfish desires? Am I willing to take a hard look at where I might be missing the mark and causing pain in my marriage?
    — I let my husband lead and do not try to take control over him.
    — I’m quick to forgive and ask forgiveness for my wrongs.

The full article is available in our e-Edition. Click here to subscribe.